Saying No to the N-word

The toughest decision facing a blogger is whether or not to follow the pack. Do I join in the larger conversations that everyone is talking about or do I set out on my own and start a new discussion?

New thread or reply? That's the eternal question.

If I go "new thread" then chances are my independent thought will get buried under the weight of a million contributions of 2 cents to trendy topics. If I go "reply" then I'm susceptible to media herding (as in idiotic stories like Balloon Boy) or worse, my agenda is set by Moron Central (Sarah Palin's latest Facebook post.)

I usually favor setting out on my own because I'd rather be independent and obscure rather than one of a million counter-knee-jerks to a knee-jerk. That's one reason why I'm often behind the times. The other reason is I'm lazy.

They say opinions are like assholes, everyone has one. But sometimes, if all the discussion around a popular issue fails to cover my angle, I feel it my sacred duty to expose the world to my very special and unique asshole.

So let me boldly crowd-surf into a once hot but now cooling topic: Dr. Laura saying the N-word several times. The funniest part? She claimed she didn't mean to hurt anyone.

That's a surprising claim from one who portrays herself as a doctor-level adviser on human relations. Apologies are good, so I'll award her a point for that, but I'm wondering what analogy would be necessary to describe how silly her retraction is? Can one even exist? Let's review: she said the most hurtful word in the English language several times and then said she didn't want to hurt anyone.

That's like shooting someone and then being surprised when they scream in pain. Or running them over and when they yell, complaining that they're yelling. Then telling them they shouldn't be hurt.

So Dr. Laura's outburst sparked another conversation about race. I tend to avoid such discussions because they all follow the same path. They either fade away into a "gosh, people are people" kind of conclusion, or they simply fade away.

Before that, discussions about racial discrimination break down this way: Whitey says "Oh it's not that bad" and black people say "Yes it is." I have to side with my African-American brothers and sisters here, because frankly, when it comes to the N-word, how would Whitey know what it's like to be called something that isn't intended to demean him?

For me, it comes down to a simple request from my fellow human. After all the descendants of the original African slaves have endured, they have but one nearly unanimous request: "Let us, if we choose, use the N-word. But if you are not a descendant of African slaves, don't use that word yourself."

That's it. No call for financial reparations. No call for making a Public Enemy tune the National Anthem. No required viewing of yet another Tyler Perry transvestite-based flick. No changing the red, white and blue, to black, green and red. African-Americans' ancestors were kidnapped, sold, beaten, murdered. Their financial age has been stalled.  Their persecution carries on to this day in genteel and not-so-genteel forms (see Breitbart-Sherrod story) and their most consistent request of us crackas is don't use the N-word?

Done.

I'm a writer. Words mean a lot to me and they have a power. Censorship is my arch enemy, but I can agree to removing one word from my lexicon. I don't need any one word (except maybe "fuck.") There are ample words in which to convey your hatred of another person. For example, assuming Dr. Laura was African-descended, I could call her the n-word, but why? Why not call her an idiot? A moron? A dunderhead? Those all fit much better and address her behavior, which she can control, and not her skin-color or ancestry, which she cannot.

p.s. Dr. Laura Schlesinger is not to be confused with Dr. Linda Schlongslinger from the super-awesome zine eXtreme Conformity.

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.