An unexplained mishap at the “Re-birthing the Soul” seminar, a gay-conversion-therapy camp, caused its Evangelical counselors to suddenly become zealous adherents of Islam.
The council that runs the therapy camp deployed their best missionaries and proselytizers in a desperate bid to revert the counselors back to Christianity.
The attempt failed.
“As-salamu alaykum,” said former Christian pastor, now Imam, Robert K. Forfeths, now Abdullah al-Harouk. “We were telling our class that being gay is a choice, that they can choose to ignore urges. Then, as if struck by lightning, I knew down to my core that Christianity was all lies.”
Former assistant Youth Pastor, now Imam, Thomas H. Elder, now Samir al-Fatir, expressed the same shock. “I’d like to go back to being Christian, but I can’t. The truth has been revealed to me through the grace of Allah and the wisdom of the Prophet Mohammad, peace be upon him..”
“They say being Muslim is a choice,” said al-Harouk, openly crying. “But this isn’t like choosing chocolate or vanilla. Allah made me. He made me like this. I cannot choose to go against his will. I can only submit to it. Allahu Akbar.”
Al-Fatir was slightly more optimistic. “Allah does not make mistakes. Of what consequence is our nature to non-believers? They should leave us be. Allah has a greater plan at work. We will see it someday, inshallah.”
One witness, a seminar attendee, spoke on condition of anonymity.
“I considered myself agnostic,” he said. “My parents made me come to this stupid thing. I kept praying for those counselors to shut the [expletive] up. Maybe there is a god.”